“Relax”

“Relax” is such a nice word, isn’t it?

I have images in my mind’s eye when I think of the word “relax”….a beach with the sound of gentle waves soothing me as I lie in a beach chair, chaise lounge or hammock. Or, I imagine sitting by a roaring fire in a comfortable chair, listening to some mellow music, maybe hanging with my honey and just enjoying the moment.

“Relax” is a word that we use when we want to kick-back, take a load-off, chill, unwind, de-stress, mellow-out, hang…take it easy.

It’s a word we don’t live by enough, as far as I am concerned. In my little world, while weekends are supposed to be the time to relax, often they are not.

Long weekends tend to work a bit better for the word “relax”…holidays are where the word is best used.

However, it seems over the past little while, the word “relax” has been used a lot in my household but for all the wrong reasons.

The champion of the new definition of this word and its use in our family, is courtesy of my 16 year old daughter.

As you can imagine without me saying anything further, when she uses the word “relax” with either my wife or myself, we do anything but relax.

Ms. !6 is a typical teenager. She is our first born, we love her to bits and by and large, she is a great kid who wouldn’t harm a fly. That being said, she is, by all accounts, a lazy-ass and I mean that in the nicest way possible.

No I don’t!

Don’t you hate having to repeat yourself when asking someone – a friend, a workmate, a spouse or in this case, a child, to do something. It could be as simple as putting away clean laundry, emptying the dishwasher, clearing dishes after a meal, making a bed…all very basic and simple tasks that we all must do on a daily basis. These tasks are mundane and boring as hell but are extremely necessary.

But when you ask that person (in this case, our child) to do it, over and over and over…only to be told to “relax”, I don’t know about you but the hairs on the back of my neck stand up and I cringe with anger.

“Relax” in this context is translated to mean, “Mom, Dad, don’t freak out…you have asked me a million times to do this…I will, I promise, at some point. But, stop bugging me – your pissing me off!!”

This is not the definition of the word, “relax” that I have come to know and understand. Plus, when Ms. 16 year old says it to us, she doesn’t say it in a mellow way, like when you go for a massage and in a whisper as the new age music comes on, you are told to “reeeee-laxxxx”. No…when she uses the word, she has reached a fever pitch with us as we have already lost our patience with her because she has failed to do what we have asked her to do a million times over.

“RELAX!!!!!”

Damn, I hate that word. I loathe it!

In recent days, we call Ms. 16 out before she uses that word. She knows that we are incensed whenever she uses it and knows that the best way to make us happy and to prevent her from using it in the first place is to simply do what we ask her to do the first time it is requested. We tell her it will save us all alot of grief and yelling. It means, “get off your lazy ass, do what we ask and be done with it, goddamn it!!”

So now, she has all but eliminated that word from her 16 year old teenage vernacular.

Unfortunately, she has replaced it with another equally annoying word – “FINE!!!!”

Teenagers…yuck!!

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About I'm Just A Dad

Stephen Gosewich is just a Dad (he is a former Enlightened Male but decided to change the name because when you search Enlightened Male, "other...wink, wink" are displayed. He spends his days during the week as a working stiff. At all other times, he just enjoys hanging out with his best friend and wife and their two very active and inspiring daughters.
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One Response to “Relax”

  1. vonzex says:

    Finally, philosophy that doesn’t sound derivative. I’ve read a lot tonight and what’s constituting as wisdom is nothing more than a series of common sayings like “be yourself” and “everything happens for a reason”. These platitudes of which few I’ve encountered to be meaningfully constructed. Great stuff. Thank you for saving me from monotony at least for a little while.

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