Colds suck!

I have one.

I got it from my wife. I am the most anal person in the world when it comes to doing things to prevent me from getting one. My hands are all dried out from using Purell and liquid hand soap. But, somehow, it found its way in.

I have a cold and its a doozy! On the “doozy-scale” I would give it an 8.5/10. Not too shabby for colds. I am filling up plastic bags with used “snot rags” by the box load. My head now hurts because I am blowing my nose so hard and I am constantly running to pee because I drink tons of water and tea to flush this thing out of me.

Yuck!

Fortunately, I don’t get colds very often. But when they strike…WATCH OUT!

Colds are about as necessary to the betterment of the world as mosquitos and squirrels. I think I can say, and I am sorry if I offend all the mosquito and squirrel lovers out there, that the world would be a much better place if all of these things weren’t around.

Seriously…what good do colds serve? The only good thing I can think of is if your boss gets a really bad cold and decides to not come into the office, then its like a day off! You always breathe a sigh of relief because the boss is away.

But if the proverbial shoe is on the other foot, your boss might feel bad for you for a split second but rest assured, he/she will be expecting you to watch your emails from home so you stay on top of things. In fact, if you completely shut down while you are at home sick, the mountains of work pile up. That is one reason why colds are unnecessary…they cut down on productivity.

I don’t really like the way I feel when I am sick. My nose starts to ooze and with constant blowing becomes all red and chaffed. I have a horrible taste in my mouth that no amount of toothbrushing or gargling will fix. If you are like me, then you must just love the sore throat that comes along with the cold. My sore throat woke me up at 3am….it was so painful to swallow that I actually woke up out of sleep. It felt like anything that has a jagged edge to it was lodged in my throat (razorblades, pins, shards of glass, scraps of metal…I could go on).

Day 2 of my cold has left me feeling incredibly achy and sore. I feel about 200 hundred years old and make very loud moans when I try to get up or shift my body into a more comfortable position. I find myself saying “oy” alot. My body feels like someone beat the crap out of it, yet I am a lover not a fighter!!

Any movement makes me break out in a sweat…so I am sedentary…which my wife just loves (esepcially since she has her own cold to deal with. She is fortunate because her sinuses are aching. I have not been so blessed). She wants me to keep my distance from my kids especially my youngest daughter who leaves for a two-night trip up north on Monday. She cannot get sick….period!

I dread what tomorrow will bring as we enter day 3 of Fall Cold 2011! If I know my body and the way colds cycle through me, my cold should be moving into my chest. My voice will deepen and I will sound like Brenda Vaccaro and get bouts of coughing which might lead to horking up the most disgusting phlegm that is inside my chest right now. My wife hates this part of my cold the most because it is absolutely gruesome sounding. I think most wives hate this part of their husband’s colds too. It isn’t a pretty sounding or visually appealing thing to witness. I think my father has cornered the market on grossness when he has a cold. When he horks…the entire city hears it. If I am lucky, the coughing snags might last 30 seconds to a minute…which will ultimately lead to sore stomach muscles on Day 4.

Do colds increase your immune system after your finished with them? Do you build up tolerances to other illnesses around you when you have had yours? I honestly don’t know but as you can see, I am trying to find the positive in a cold. Its not as if I can take the day off from working and spend the day outside. Feeling like crap is feeling like crap…there is no way to avoid it.

I know that by Day 5, I will have turned the corner and I will begin to start feeling better. No more excuses to give my wife for shirking my household responsibilities (“sorry, hun…I don’t want to contaminate anything” or “sorry, hun…I am so achy, I can’t possibly lift the laundry hamper and take it down to the basement”).

The party will be over and so will my cold.

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About I'm Just A Dad

Stephen Gosewich is just a Dad (he is a former Enlightened Male but decided to change the name because when you search Enlightened Male, "other...wink, wink" are displayed. He spends his days during the week as a working stiff. At all other times, he just enjoys hanging out with his best friend and wife and their two very active and inspiring daughters.
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One Response to Colds suck!

  1. I take Proancynol at a low dose every day (1 pill a day) and I seriously am never sick. When I used to get sick I’d take the regular dosage (2 pills per day) and it would knock out the sickness in 2 days. It boosts your immune system allowing it to kill viral, bacterial and fungal invaders. And it has an ingredient which they use for alcohol poisoning on emergency rooms and the function here is to flush out the dead cells once the other ingredients allow your body to attack them. It’s not expensive either. Even if you can’t get it in time to help this one, you’ll have it for next time around. If you have questions shoot me an email marie.todd@chrisbyrnesllc.com. Peace! Feel better. Oh yeah the link – http://www.proancynol.com

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