You’ve changed!!

In a previous posting, I talked a little about the social media and my daughter’s love of Facebook.

As I continue to try to get the word out about my blog, I have been spending more time on Facebook and Twitter than normal. Advice was given to me by a friend who said that the only way to build readership is to nail down individual blog followers one by one.

I received a “Friend Request” the other day and when I went to open the notification, I paused, not really knowing or recognizing the person I had been notified by.

After a few minutes…I remembered him. I closed my eyes and flashed back to junior high school, which is where I think I first met and saw him. While not a close friend, I would characterize him more as an acquaintance. But good for him to remember me and reach out to me on Facebook. Clearly I left a lasting impression on him!!

I write about this because it always amazes me how some people can change over time. Believe me, I know what age can do to a person. But I look at my face in the mirror every day and other than having facial growth after days of not shaving and less hair but more grey and ok…a few extra pounds, I don’t see that much of a difference in the way I look. You can still tell its me.

My memory of this guy who requested me as a friend, is that of a tall, lanky guy with a mop of brown hair and very quiet but always kind. The pictures on Facebook showed a heavier set man without any hair and a grey goatee. You can understand why he didn’t leap right out at me when I saw the notification!

Political correctness and common courtesy says that you don’t say to the guy, “boy, I hardly recognized you…you’ve changed”. But, I can almost guarantee that when many of us run into long lost friends or acquaintances, this is what we think.

Not only can time and age change the way a person looks, but circumstances and life experiences. While I know nothing of what this guy has been up to the past 25-30 years, who knows what kinds of things life has thrown his way? For all I know he could be living a charmed life…or he could be living a life filled with challenges and tragedy.

I remember running into a woman who I went to middle school with. Back in the day, she was the girl that every guy fantasized about. Tall, shapely…a total “babe”. When I saw her, I had images of when she was young but she had gone through some pretty heavy duty events in her adult life and it clearly changed her.

Other than perhaps exchanging pleasantries such as, “what have you been up to these last 30 years”, I suspect that this person will only remain an acquaintance of mine on Facebook.

I guess that is the whole point of Facebook, discovering people from your past and hoping that they have a good current picture of themselves posted, so, just like passing a car accident on the highway, you can stare and wonder “what happened?”.

The truly scary thing is, who knows what people say about me?

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About I'm Just A Dad

Stephen Gosewich is just a Dad (he is a former Enlightened Male but decided to change the name because when you search Enlightened Male, "other...wink, wink" are displayed. He spends his days during the week as a working stiff. At all other times, he just enjoys hanging out with his best friend and wife and their two very active and inspiring daughters.
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2 Responses to You’ve changed!!

  1. Stephen, great post! I felt as if you were talking right to me. 😉

    So, what have you been up to these last 30 years…?

    I came across your blog just now through Facebook. I also came across the Facebook 25th High School Class Reunion photos, which is where I saw you. Not sure how I found them, seeing as the reunion was almost three years ago… too bad I missed it, I think I would have enjoyed myself.

    My memory is not what it used to be, especially about specific people and details in my life as a child, teen or young adult. That being said, it was great to remember names (or make believe I remembered them), and see faces of a life now past, but more important than I ever gave credit to.

    And, as you eluded to, in school I was indeed quite a quiet guy; which, naturally made me more of an acquaintance than a friend to just about everybody.

    I thank you for accepting my friend request Stephen. If for no other reason, than to solidify a crossing of paths once or twice, in each other’s lives.

    • Hi Stephen,
      Thanks for taking the time out to find me…but to also take further time out to read my blog.
      I have been at this whole blogging thing now for about 6 weeks and I am loving it…I am hoping to actually do something more with it.
      Supposedly am getting an article published in a mag…no money…just exposure.
      I hope the posting didn’t upset you or offend you in any way…it was not the intent…merely to talk about the whole culture of Facebook and how time can change someone…in some cases for the better!!
      I have come across many other people through FB who maybe weren’t the nicest people back in school but who have clearly grown up and truly matured.
      What has your experience been?

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