Looking versus Seeing

We attended our elder daughter’s holiday concert the other night, marking the end of the “2010 Holiday Concert Tour” for my wife and me! These evenings are often hot, germ-infested, long and drawn out affairs. But it’s always worth it when you finally see your child get up on stage and perform, regardless of their age.

Molly’s school is pretty big for a middle school. As a result, there were probably 600 people in attendance at the event; mostly proud parents, siblings and maybe the occasional grandparent thrown in for good measure.

Several other bands, string quartets and ensembles performed before Molly’s choir got up on stage to do their thing. So she wasn’t in the auditorium at the very beginning. But then, about half way through the evening, she came in.

I saw her…then I looked at her.

Activity was all around me…parents chatting with each other, fellow student/bandmates excitedly babbling up a storm, siblings moving to and fro. But, for a few minutes, I paused and looked at her.

She was across the auditorium from me, engaged in conversation with her friends, unaware of me looking at her. She was just being herself.

As hokey as it might sound, a warmth came over me. There, before me was my first-born daughter; a tall, stunning, intelligent, beautiful human being. I then looked to my left and saw my younger daughter, Annie, sitting on my wife’s lap, listening to the performances and just being; my dynamic, adorable, happy younger daughter; another wonderful human being inside and out.

Do you ever see something but not look at it? We probably are most guilty of this with those people that are closest to us; our children or our spouses/partners.

I see my children every day….but sometimes I don’t look at them. When our children are first born, we are in awe by the miracle of their birth; little, new beings that will hopefully have a long life filled with amazing adventure and joyous experiences. As they grow up, we can easily forget about the miracle of their existence; we stop looking at them.

I have been married for 19 years…something that I am very proud of. I have stayed married for 19 years and plan to be married to my wife for another 99 years because I love her…but realize now that sometimes I don’t look at her. When I do, I quickly remember why I fell in love with her in the first place and those reasons are far too personal to ever share in a blog, but I would like to think that she knows the reasons why.

“Looking” is simply another way of saying that we should all consider slowing down; to “stop and smell the coffee”. We can see something, day in and day out, but in our past-faced world, never take the time to slow down, look at it and really appreciate it.

If at all possible after you are finished reading this blog, look at something that is important to you, whatever that may be.


About I'm Just A Dad

Stephen Gosewich is just a Dad (he is a former Enlightened Male but decided to change the name because when you search Enlightened Male, "other...wink, wink" are displayed. He spends his days during the week as a working stiff. At all other times, he just enjoys hanging out with his best friend and wife and their two very active and inspiring daughters.
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2 Responses to Looking versus Seeing

  1. Debbie Donsky says:

    Did you mean “past faced”? If yes, I love it! If no, say yes!

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